One of the experiences that occurred rarely to me, earlier, has come to stay! Once in a blue moon, I used to feel "What the heck is happening? What am I doing here?" eg, while riding a bike, something to the effect that "who's taking me on the bike?" This, in lesser clarity of questions, is happening continuously. I'm feeling lost to the extent that yesterday or even a few hours earlier seem hazy like a dream. Nothing ever happened? I think Papaji's calling; lets get the book at least.
I'm sure all this is a dream now... God, please help me to snap out of this dream, not the feeling.
2 comments:
This is also called being an observer in one's own life.
Basically, you observe yourself doing things as a third person. As in, either you can assume that you are doing things and you as a third person are observing yourself. Or you can assume that you are observing that you are as a third person are doing things.
It is a very common thing that I would be driving my car and at the same time observe myself as driving the car. It sounds fun but is actually a very awful state to be in.
Last time when it persisted for too long, I got really worried. Finally, I found out what the problem was. I'll not get into the details of what the problem was but would share how I think you can find out the core issue.
Basically, there are one or more elements of your routine that are causing this trouble. No, they may not be the ones that you think are obvious. They could be very subtle.
So, to find out the core issues, try breaking your routine. Break it piece by piece; activity by activity. Don't do the same things. Do the same things at different time. Also, you can try taking a break.
I am sure, breaking the routine (activity by activity) will tell you what's bloody wrong with your life!
Hey, thanks for your thoughts. Let me start bottom up... first of all, there's nothing wrong in my life.. its getting right, in fact. :)
Secondly, since you've faced *similar* things, but found an awful state to be in, yours was a good decision to find out the core. To me, this path leads in to the core I believe in. Its rather "one man's food is other man's poison" when I say I don't want to snap out of the state but out of the dream.
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